Hard to let go

As hard as I'm trying to fight it, life has been moving on, albeit very slowly. I miss my dad still so much that even thinking about the week he died instantly brings tears to my eyes. Father's day will never be the same. California trips will never be the same. Trips home will never be the same. None of us will ever be the same. There are so many hard things dealing with his loss, but the hardest so far for me has been knowing what we're going to be missing out on as time goes on. No more Papa Bill horsey rides, no more Papa Bill holding our newborns, no more calls to Papa Bill asking him questions I know only he'll have the answers to. I still sometimes will hear a song on the radio and pick up my phone to call him and talk to him about it. I miss hearing "What in the world, Lindsay girl!?"
So yes, life is moving on, whether I want it to or not. And the distractions are just that: distractions. I always go to bed with a pit in my stomach...thinking about him and my mom. But I know that he is fine, I know he would just tell us to "keep the faith." He always wrote that in his notes and I know he means it. I know I need to show more faith in my Heavenly Father and trust he'll get us all through, that no good man is taken before his time.
I'm grateful for friends who have done amazing things for me, from showing up to support me at my dad's funeral to coming home to a fridge full of food, to just being an ear to listen or shoulder to cry on. I have been looked after in so many ways, I can't even begin to thank everyone enough. I'm grateful for the love that's been shown to my mom, especially since I can't physically be with her when I know it's the hardest.
But like Bill says, we gotta just keep the faith. We'll keep tryin' Papa Bill. But just remember, no one is as patient as you;)